MOVIE STAR By Phil Brooks 2 RAR Delta Coy 12 Platoon
We were in the Solomon Islands in 2003 – the first ones there when it all flared up. It took probably a couple of months to do all the main stuff we had to do and it started to quieten down a bit, so the battalion decided to start an R&R rotation. It just so happened that our section was back at the GBR (Guadalcanal Beach Resort), which was the main FOB, and the other two sections were out on the other islands somewhere, so we were chosen to go on some rest first.
The section jumped on this dodgy little Cessna and flew to a resort island (if you can call it that) to a place called Gizo – the furthest western island and just east of Bougainville – mostly run by Aussie ex pats. We booked into our hotel and quickly went up to the restaurant where they opened the bar for us. We were drinking beers at 0800 and after a few months off the piss, you can imagine how many beers were going down. We grabbed a few bottles and a box of beer or two and went back to the rooms where there was a pool as well.
As we sat out on the deck getting drunker, a Filipino bird walked by and asked if we wanted girls. After a few seconds of conferring, we said yes, so she asked for some money to buy fresh fish for a barbecue. She gave us an address and told us to meet her at her house for a barbecue and girls would be there. Being good digs, we obliged and a few hours later we were at her joint, even more drunk, with these two girls who turned out to be locals. They had the blackest skin, fuzziest hair and bad smell but fortunately no beetle nut teeth. So we chatted to them and decided to take them back to the nightclub at the hotel.
We got back to the hotel and were drinking even more and filling the girls up as well, meanwhile getting some weird looks from the expats. Anyhow, a few hours later I noticed that the girls and a few of the blokes had gone. Not wanting to miss out on the action, I stumbled back to the room that I was sharing with Patty Morris.
I walked in and there were both girls with Patty. One was sitting on the bed and the other was sucking his dick. Now, no word of a lie, Patty was a fucking monster. I thought to myself that these girls wouldn’t have a bar of me when Patty could drill both at the same time. On this contemplation, the rest of the section walked in with a video camera and started filming the whole affair.
Being the entertainer that Patty was and getting his old fella seen to, I slipped the same chick a digit. She swung around immediately and yelled at the top of her lungs, “BROOOOOKKSSSSSYYYYY, YOOOOUUUU CRAAAAZZZZZYYYY” and then proceeded to jump me. I gave it to her on the other bed with the camera still rolling.
The next thing I knew, it was morning. I was asleep on the floor with a lino face and minus a $1500 Solies lighter ($300 Aus). The fucking hookers had robbed me. The video camera came in five minutes later and we all watched the episode that had unfolded the night before. We had a good old laugh and all promised that the tape was to be deleted so as not to leave any evidence.
Anyhow, we got back to Australia a few months later and blokes were telling me that they’d seen a porno from the Solies with me in it. It turned out that my mate had the tape burned to DVD and probably had copies.
It was a pretty funny night. A lot of other drunken shit happened and we got in strife. The other sections didn’t get R&R, as I think we helped fuck it for everyone else along with a pioneer section who fucked up on a different island.
